Moonbathing

If you were reading the last post on here, you might have noticed that I mentioned it had been delayed by a few weeks because something came up. That something was this:

A trip to the other side of the Pacific Ocean where I spent a week in the lost city of San Francisco. Aside from one rather nasty incident towards the end it was quite enjoyable, but this is a hobby blog, not a travel blog, so I will spare the details of my holiday here, save that the Americans of the Bay Area appear to have through some diabolical nefarious sorcery stolen the Southern Hemisphere's climate - despite it supposedly being in the middle of Autumn when I was there, the weather was routinely at summer levels of warmth and lack of cloud. I was told that they were going through an Indian Summer, but I suspect that the truth is something far darker and more insidious...

While there however, I did make an effort to hit up the local hobby stores over there. They were... well I guess they were what I'd expect them to be. There were only two model retailers I could find within walking distance of the hotel, and of them only one was really a hobby store in the tabletop sense, and it wasn't really that different to the few in Auckland that I've been to, save for slightly more artwork on the walls. In hindsight I don't know why I was expecting them to be noticeably different.

As I predicted though, they did still possess some examples of older models in stock, and so I was able to return home in triumph with these spoils.

Three blister packs of models (One Fantasy, two 40k), a box 'O' skeletons and two books - the 3.5 edition Codex: Imperial Guard and the 7th edition Beastmen army book. A fine haul to be sure, especially given the limited budget I had to spend on mementos.

The full gaming store that I visited possessed quite a few old blister packs still available, but after some thorough searching I found three that were most desirable for me. Fortunately being older stock meant they were massively discounted, and so I was able to get them all. They include a classic metal Tau Pathfinder Shas'Ui, which was the one metal Pathfinder model I never got around to getting - I decided to paint up a standard Pathfinder model as the team's Shas'Ui instead as I liked the pose better. Because of this I was determined not to pass up this rare second chance, and the model will make a fine leader of my future Pathfinder team(s), though I'm still working out the specifics of integrating him (or possibly her). The most promising solution I've thought of so far is making the model a higher-level Pathfinder commander and simply attaching him (or possibly her) to the Pathfinder teams when needed (AKA putting it in charge of a Pathfinder team in games every so often when it takes my fancy).

Perhaps even more valuable to me though was the classic metal shield drone bits that were included in the blister pack (by the way, have I ever mentioned how much I LOVE the old blister packs? Because they are amazing and I still hate GW for switching over to those infernal clam-packs). Again, shield drones were never really something that I stocked up on, since I always worked under the assumption that if I ever assigned drones to characters that gun drones would offer more bang for my buck (pun intended). This changed when I began to read up on the utility of shield drones in keeping Broadside Teams alive (this was back in the dark days of late 5th edition 40k, where railguns were kind of the only thing Tau still had going for them so the survival of anything with a railgun on it was sort of a priority) while freeing up a support system slot for target locks to maximise the number of targets one could shoot at with a Broadside team, and since my Tau army could only affort a maximum of one Broadside team that was somewhat important. While I improvised in games by using weaponless gun drones as proxies, that was only ever meant to be a temporary stopgap until I ordered some extra shield drone bits from GW online. Unfortunately the classic metal/resin shield drone bitz pack was discontinued by GW before I could get around to purchasing one, and the newer plastic version they brought out as a replacement is not only woefully less cost-efficient, yielding only one shield drone compared to the four you could make with the old bitz pack, but also produces a noticeably different shield drone design, with different antennae and a considerably redesigned shield generator. Since I consider the newer shield drone model to be totally lame compared to the cool older version, this leaves me in somewhat of a dilemma, and so any older shield drone components I can get my hands on is welcome.

They also include a Bretonnian Mounted Yeoman for Warhammer Fantasy. Given the rarity of these models (they were, I believe, among the first Bretonnian models from the 6th/7th edition range to be discontinued and never reappeared for the rest of Warhammer Fantasy's time as an official GW game) I'm still amazed I was able to get one for so cheap. I was somewhat expecting to find three of them in the blister, as I dimly recall GW selling them in threes at one point on the website, but in hindsight that was probably a small white box number like the 5-strong units of Eternal Guard and Wardancers. Speaking of which, there was also another incredible find there - one of the special release Wardancer models (I believe it was a Whirling Death if I recall correctly), which I also never ended up getting. I was deeply tempted to pick it up, but unfortunately it was a little bit outside my price range, and I figured multiple blister packs for different systems would give me more value for my money. I doubt I will ever see it again in my lifetime, so I can only wish that whatever lucky bastard manages to buy it fully appreciates and cherishes the treasure they own, and does not squander it.

Anyway, back to the yeoman, it may have been a letdown to only get one, but at least I got that one. He will make a fine addition to my small Bretonnian army, especially if I can find another 2-5 friends for him.

This mighty fortunate find was found at a different place, a collectables store in the Japantown centre (oh yes, there's a Japantown in 'Frisco as well as a Chinatown). Their assortment of GW models didn't feature as much in the way of older stock, making this one a much easier choice to purchase - it was either this or a classic metal Chaos Dreadnought, and I figured this one would give me more value for my money, again. It is an older (5th edition vintage if I'm not mistaken) box set of Skeletons for use in either of the two Undead armies in Warhammer Fantasy (in fact depending on when it was first released they may still have been just one Undead faction). Eventually it was replaced in the Vampire Counts model range by a newer Skeleton box, but apparently from what I gather the kit soldiered on in the Tomb Kings range, albeit with a repackaging and some extra bits like more Ancient Egyptian-styled shields. The box was in fantastic condition too, the damage in the bottom right corner coming from being crushed in-between other suitcase contents on the trip home, which is great because it means I can enjoy the fantastic artwork on it (if you remember I tend to be fascinated by model box artwork).

A lot of people apparently aren't fond of this Skeleton kit, but I've always really enjoyed it. It helps that I'm quite fond of a lot of classic Fantasy tropes, and I'm very tolerant of technical shortcomings when it comes to models; it's aesthetics that I really value, so if I'm given a choice between a dynamically posed, perfectly realistically proportioned plastic model with tons of options that I can't stand the look of and a static, exaggerated metal monopose model that I love the aesthetics of, I will pick the latter every single time. As a result I've never really understood the hate for this Skeleton kit, especially as it contains a full 20 Skeleton models (which is twice as much as the later kit contained) which is enough for an entire complete unit that's a NORMAL size rather than those gargantuan 30+ strong abominations that people were obsessed with in 8th edition.

This means that I also actually have an Undead infantry unit for my Vampire to lead when I eventually get around to painting her, and ironically fits with the Lahmian theme perfectly. I still want(ed) a Vampire Counts army that was mostly if not entirely, well... not skeletons, but hey you can never have too many Skeletons in a fantasy adventure and they'll work well with the other handful of Skeletons I got with another purchase - I have some ideas for how to use them in games. I was going to name them Gashadokuro. on account of getting them from Japantown and all (plus still being blown away by Kubo: Legend of the Two Strings), but a quick spot of research on wikipedia suggests that they'd probably be too small for that, so I'll have to default to plan B and give them a unit name that has something to do with barrows. Y'know, given that barrows are basically hills you bury dead people in, and I got them in San Francisco which is notorious for being full of hills.

As well as old blister packs, I also discovered a cache of older books, including a copy of the 3.5 edition Codex: Imperial Guard. The Imperial Guard books weren't the highest on my list of old gamebooks to get, but finding it there, combined with the repeatedly-slashed price, made this a target of opportunity that was too much to pass up. It continues the trend of concentrated weapons-grade EPIC that is common to all 3.5 edition era books I have come across, with a fantastic piece of cover artwork by Karl Kopinski and a beautiful inside cover illustration that really captures the anachronistic grandeur of the Imperium in relation to its mainline standing army. One thing I found unusual was the book's layout. Most 3.5 edition codexes I have seen all share a broadly similar pattern of: Background > Army List > Colour Hobby Section > Extras, but the Imperial Guard codex instead has the colour section towards the front, just after a few pages of introductory background. I guess this was so that they could consolidate the rules material all into one place, but then the even more rules-heavy 3.5 edition Chaos Space Marine codex still had the colour section in the back, when you'd think it would make sense there too. This also marks the second 3.5 edition era codex I have encountered that doesn't include a special scenario in it somewhere, putting the total tally at 50/50 between ones that do and don't have scenarios in them. Come to think of it, the 3rd edition Tyranid codex never had one in it either, which is very weird because you'd think that it would be the perfect place to drop in a special 'Tyranid Attack' scenario. I'm starting to think that special scenarios in the codexes and army books might be the exception rather than the rule, which is sad because I always thought including a special themed scenario was a really neat idea.

Also of note in this codex is the legendary Doctrines system, perhaps best described as a kind of Chapter Tactics for Imperial Guard regiments (and by Chapter Tactics I mean the earlier version where you could pick and choose from a bunch of different options that could be combined, rather than the rigid version 6th edition 40k introduced). There weren't quite as many Doctrines available in the codex itself as I was expecting, so I imagine a lot of the ones people tend to reminisce over were included later in White Dwarf. Even so there are some pretty cool ones included - Light Infantry seems particularly kick-ass (Infiltrate on everyone? Giving one infantryman in any squad a sniper rifle instead of using up two to make a heavy weapon team? Yes please). All in all I think I know exactly which ones I'd take for the regiments I've invented.

As well as the Imperial Guard codex, I also found a copy of the 7th edition Beastmen army book for Warhammer Fantasy, which  was high on my to-get list. As I understand it this book was the last army book to be released for 7th edition Warhammer Fantasy, and it definitely shows. I mentioned in the last post how I thought the 3rd edition Tyranid codex felt like a prototype 3.5 edition book, and if that's the case then this book feels like a prototype 8th edition army book in a lot of places. There's still plenty of cool black and white artwork in it, mind, but there are a lot of times where the writing has a particularly 8th edition, dare I say even Wardian style to it - one piece about how Beastmen Warherds often take down castles in Bretonnia by goading something called a Ramhorn into charging the castle gate (and how a lack of widespread Ramhorn numbers is apparently the only thing stopping them from overrunning Bretonnia. Y'know, because it's not like there's any heavily armed Knights that can fight back or anything) stood out as particularly egregious to me, It also has a disturbingly similar layout to the 8th edition books, right down to the formatting of the bestiary section and a colour illustration of shield and standard designs at the end of the colour hobby section.

On the positive side, this book also includes a selection of magic items that I enjoy much more than the 6th edition magic item armoury. The in-game effectiveness of a lot of them is up for debate, but some of the background descriptions are exactly the sort of creepy side of Chaos that I look for - particular standouts include the magic weapon Everbleed, the Chalice of Dark Rain and the Manbane Standard. Not only that, but this book includes the Lore of the Wild, a unique spell lore for Beastmen armies that I've always been really fond of. I've always loved unique spell lores, and the background behind the Lore of the Wild is fantastic, not to mention the thematic side of it making an excellent dark and twisted mirror to my favourite Warhammer Fantasy spell lore of all time, the Lore of Athel Loren in the Wood Elf army book. On top of all that there are rules for Jabberslythes, which I've always liked, and a host of what are actually some very interesting special characters with really fascinating backstory ideas.


And in other news, I experienced a stunning revelation the other day when browsing the GW website. In the distant past GW went through a phase during the 1990s that is known to many as the 'Red Period'. It is often remembered with scorn by many Warhammer grognards as a time of childish background, poor model designs and a general dumbing down of everything by GW, as well as garish colour schemes that frequently made use of the colour red (hence why it's called the 'Red Period'). I was just thinking about this as I looked through the GW website when I saw the new Horus Heresy Custode models. And then it hit me.


We are living in GW's Gold Period.


No, seriously, think about it. This era of GW that we're living in is a brand new 'Red Period', only this time with gold instead of red. All of the parallels are there. Juvenile, one-dimensional background? Check. Poor model designs? Oh yes. General dumbing down of rules? Depending on how you view AoS, you betcha. And I'll tell you what, over the last four years, GW has started using a lot of gold in their studio paint schemes. The new Custodes and Sisters of Silence, the Sigmarines, the Tempestus Scions, and those are just the examples that immediately come to mind - the GW studio schemes today have just as much gold in them as the GW studio schemes of the 90s had red.

Will we see a 'Bronze Age of GW' afterwards, the same way that the Red Period heralded the legendary Silver Age of GW? That is the question, but I have my doubts. Even assuming GW survives that long, I have a feeling that the current trends aren't going to stop anytime soon.

Man this time I'm spending out in space is really helping me clear my head and think about these things. I think I'll stay up here just a little while longer...

Lousy Zogg'in Squig-thiev'in Sunuva'Grot only sold me 'alf a Krooza!

The Glory And The Scum

Where is it!! WHERE IS IT!! It was here only a day ago! WHO HAS STOLEN MY RIGHTFUL PRIZE!! YOU DARE TO ROB ME OF WHAT IS MINE!? YOU WILL PAY DEARLY FOR YOUR DEFIANCE!! I WILL HUNT YOU THROUGH ETERNITY IN THIS LIFE AND THE NEXT!! YOU WILL NEVER BE SAFE FROM MY WRATH!! MINIONS! TO ME!

Ahem. So as I was hitting up the local second-hand bookstore I managed to find another lot of old Warhammer books.

They're the 3rd edition Codex: Tyranids and the 6th edition Chaos Warriors army book for Warhammer Fantasy (back when it was Hordes of Chaos and Demons were still part of the book. Ahh those were the days). There was also a copy of the 3rd edition Space Marine codex and the 3rd edition Warhammer 40,000 rulebook. I was going to get the 3rd edition rulebook, but in between me checking it was still there and actually going to buy it (two consecutive days) some bastard swooped in and bought it before I could. The Space Marine codex was left, and as far as I am aware is still there. I was tempted to buy it as well, but I'm not really sure how much use I'd get from it since I have no desire at all to ever own a (loyalist) Space Marine army, ever.

The 3rd edition Tyranids codex was admittedly my main target, and was an extremely fortunate find as it was the next 3rd edition codex I wanted to get after the 3.5 edition Chaos Space Marines book. I have plans, you see, to get it and the 4th edition Tyranid codex that followed it in order to try and compile a full catalogue of every Tyranid biomorph that's been published in Warhammer 40,000's history. An impossible task to be sure, for the Great Devourer is constantly mutating and evolving, but I want to get a good idea of all the biomorphs that have been featured and what they do for use in designing homebrew rules.

A cursory look through Lexicanum seems to indicate that this was the last of the 'first generation' of 3rd edition Warhammer 40,000 codexes, released just before the famous 3.5 edition books, and it definitely shows. From the artwork to the background stories to the overall layout, the whole book feels like a prototype 3.5 edition codex. The cover artwork has the same sort of gritty, realistic style as most of the 3.5 edition cover art (in sharp contrast to the more vividly colourful first generation 3rd edition codex covers), and it's easily my favourite out of the Tyranid codex covers. The tortured, dying sun, the pack of gaunts barrelling straight towards the viewer, the sickly green glow from the barbed strangler, the fantastic use of indistinct background shapes and the dark brooding colour scheme all drive home exactly what the Tyranids are to me. The internal artwork also has a distinctly 3.5 edition feel, with many pieces in the softer sketch style of the late 3rd edition period rather than the comparatively sharper and more immediately Blancheian early 3rd edition artwork. There are a few exceptions, some of which (like a small piece at the end of the book depicting some giant Tyranid spores drifting between celestial bodies) would later end up in Battlefleet Gothic: Armada. There is also a delightfully creepy background art on many pages that mimics the amazing inside cover, which lends a fantastic ambience to the book.

It is still at the same 40something page length of the early 3rd edition codexes, but pound for pound there's an astonishing amount of stuff in there. The rules are somewhat light, especially for biomorphs - I was expecting that most of the biomorphs featured in the 4th edition codex would have gotten their start here, but it seems like many of them (especially the Carnifex upgrades) were invented for the later book. Consequently the 'armoury' section is fairly thin, with most of the customisation options coming from the optional mutation and genetic engineering rules at the back of the book. The unit and weapon stats had some interesting features, bio-acid spore mines weren't quite as hardcore as I was anticipating them to be, and I'm still struggling to imagine why I would want to use Devourers, especially on gaunts - I know the models look pretty funky, but I'm just not sure exactly what 2 strength 2 shots are meant to accomplish. Is it a numbers thing where you're aiming to force wounding 6s and failed armour saves through sheer weight of dice? They seem slightly better on Warriors and Raveners where they get bolter strength and 6 shots each respectively, but then I can't help but think how much better Deathspitters look since they have better range, AP and strength, and seem like they'd hit just as many enemies per shooting round since they're blast weapons. Likewise rending claws seem kind of redundant on the monstrous creatures since they already ignore armour saves automatically, unless you want to giggle about Carnifexes getting AP22 against vehicles in close combat (which admittedly is kind of fun to think about). Ah what do I care, it's not like I've ever been interested in the competitive gaming side of this hobby anyway.

Speaking of non-gaming stuff, there's a healthy colour section nestled in the middle of the book with a lot of helpful hobby material and a layout that's eerily similar to the colour section in the later 3rd edition Tau codex. It has guides on converting and assembling Tyranid models, as well as plenty of photos of what is actually my favourite incarnation of the Tyranid model range. Yes, I like this one more than the 4th edition range - THERE I SAID IT! The 4th edition range has a lot of nice technical attributes in the form of bits and opportunities for customisation, to be sure, but in terms of aesthetics the 3rd edition range has it pretty solidly beat hands down as far as I'm concerned. The scything talons look like actual talons on the larger models (whereas the ones on the 4th edition models tend to look more like long chitin-covered fingers to me), and the whole range just looks more threatening to me than the later versions (I've never understood the 'friendly smiles' complaint that gets levelled at this range a lot - the grins on the models always looked more psychotic or sinister to me). Most of my favourite Tyranid models are also from this time, including the 3rd edition Lictor and Biovore (for some reason the later versions of them just never looked right to me), the Raveners with their wicked looking maws, the Tyrant Guard (I always liked the 'elite warrior bodyguard' style of the 3rd edition Tyrant Guard rather than the pudgy balls of chitin from the later editions) and of course the awe inspiring 3rd edition Hive Tyrant. I even have plans to convert one of the newer Hive Tyrant models back into the 3rd edition style if I ever start a Tyranid army...

Since I couldn't get the 3rd edition rulebook, I consoled myself with this, the 6th edition Chaos Warriors army book for Warhammer Fantasy. I don't remember exactly how it was received at the time, and I have some trouble discerning the community's memory of this book with that of the 7th edition one (wait there was a 7th edition Warriors of Chaos army book right? I distinctly remember there being one, that was an actual thing and I'm not going insane yes?), but GW certainly seems to have made a big deal about it at the time - right after the contents page there's a page-long introductory spiel about how this book will change everything for Chaos armies (There's also a corresponding page at the back with advice on how to proxy older Chaos models not represented in the book as stuff that does have rules for it in the book, which I quite liked) along with the later Beasts of Chaos army book and a mysterious second companion book that never seems to have materialised.

As far as army books go, it's massive - easily the lengthiest one I've come across so far, and full of background information about Chaos and the Northern Chaos-worshipping barbarian tribes of the Warhammer World, and a lengthy army list section not entirely unlike that of its 40k cousin the 3.5 edition Chaos Space Marines book. However, I've never actually been that interested in the Warriors side of Chaos in Warhammer Fantasy (or the Chaos Space Marines in 40k for that matter - it's always been the creepier sinister insidious paranormal horror side of Chaos that's interested me rather than the fightey punchy heavy metal side), so really the main reason I wanted it was to plunder the magic items section for goodies to give the Beastmen army I wanted but will almost certainly never get (the magic item armouries in the two army books are inter-compatible with one another you see - as I understand it a Beastmen character can take stuff from the Chaos Warriors armoury, and vice versa). There were a couple of things in it that caught my interest, like the Hellfire Sword or the Blade of Blood, but ultimately I was kind of let down by the magic items - again, they mostly seemed to be of the whole raging fighty warrior style of Chaos, and that's really not what I'm looking for when it comes to the Ruinous Powers. Still, there's a lot of neat stuff in that book.

If you follow GW news a lot then you'll probably know that they recently switched their hobby magazine, White Dwarf, back to a monthly format after a stint as a weekly pamphlet. I was going to write something about this sooner (I've actually had this copy for a few weeks now), but something came up and I had to delay this whole post by a couple of weeks or so. Unfortunately at least half of the content featured in it is for a system I have absolutely no interest in whatsoever (and no GW, taking the 8th edition Dwarf Slayer model and giving it a new paint job does not make it a special Grombrindal model), so it was off to a bad start already, but on the positive side I was pleased to see two female White Dwarf team members featured prominently on the staff list inside the cover - as someone who has wanted for some time to see more... girls? Women? Ladies? I'm not quite sure what the most appropriate term to use here is, but more female hobbyists at any rate (and more female computer gamers too for that matter) I'm always glad to see a blow against the whole male dominated hobby thing. All genders should be welcome in the world of tabletop wargames.

Other features include some background stuff about Imperial Knights, which might have excited me 5 or 6 years ago but is now of little use since I've grown almost entirely self-sufficient when it comes to tabletop background material (3-10 years of stupid official background will do that to you) and some designers' notes on the ungodly eyesore that is the 8th edition Nagash model released for the thrice-damned ET series, which much like the 8th edition Treeman model and its unclean spawn in the AoS sylvaneth range possesses an uncanny ability to make my blood boil even now over a year after its release. Ultimately it was a good attempt at putting more content back in, but after experiencing the glory of the early 2000s era White Dwarfs I don't think anything will ever truly compare.

The most profound reaction I had, however, was with the featured army of the month, a very large Biel-Tan Craftworld Eldar army featuring some damn fine paint work. Reading about it though, and some of the history behind it, I couldn't help but feel... sad. I've touched on the death of most of my hobby dreams a few times before, but one in particular I don't think I've mentioned yet is that I've sort of always wanted to have one of my armies or fleets featured in a White Dwarf article. Ever since I first started reading through White Dwarfs (and even before then on the old GW website) I would always liked looking at the featured armies (starting with none other than the legendary Tau army of Sebastian 'Tael' Stuart himself in the first issue of White Dwarf I ever purchased) and reading the owner's commentary about them - what made them go with that paint scheme, where the idea for the army came from, how they did this particular conversion and so on, and I would always dream of one day seeing my own army (later armies when I expanded into more than one) featured in White Dwarf so that other hobbyists might enjoy reading about it like I had before them.

Unfortunately it seems that my views have become diametrically opposed to GW's. I hate metaplots like the one they torpedoed Warhammer Fantasy with and the one they're driving into 40k, and I genuinely see nothing good in just about every GW model released in the last couple of years (the closest I get to having a positive thing to say about them is the occasional "Meh... it's kind of ok... I guess..." or "I suppose I could use one or two parts from that in a conversion... maybe..." which is a very far cry from the "WOW that's awesome!" that literally any GW model released between 1999 and 2008 universally gets from me, or the "Hey that's pretty neat/cool!" reaction that any GW model from before 1999 gets*). Ultimately, all the GW and Forgeworld models I love are from the past, not the future.

This means that in all likelihood I will never get featured in a White Dwarf article, or even on the GW website. My armies/fleets will never be showcased in lavish professional photographs, I will never be able to share any anecdotes or cool stories with millions of readers across the world, and worst of all I will never inspire another hobbyist the way the ones featured in those showcases inspired me. The closest I'll get is this blog, and considering that it's buried under 4 and a half pages in a google search for 'Naked Metal' I'm not sure how many aspiring young hobbyists are going to find it...

On that note however I do wish to express my immense joy and excitement at GW's new 'Made to Order' service for older models. As someone who has been calling for a cast-on-demand archive service for years now I was thrilled to discover the announcement on the GW website and the first wave of old Imperial Guard models to get the treatment. There are still a couple of kinks that could be ironed out (I still think a minimum availability period of 48 hours is too short to reach the most people who would be interested), but it's a definite step in the right direction and has my full support and OHMYGOD They're even in metal!!

Well done GW. Keep going down that path and you might actually start getting more money from me.

Lunar Interlude

Classichammer is fucking awesome 

You want a Dwarf army? 

There's your fucking Dwarf army 

You want some newer models? 

Fuck you 

Dwarves can do lots of stuff like enchant artillery pieces. Can you enchant an artillery piece? 

Fuck no 

Play Classichammer

In case you aren't the most internet-savvy, the above is of course a parody of the famous advertisement for popular indie-game Dwarf Fortress (and Classichammer is apparently the name for playing Warhammer Fantasy with 6th - early 8th edition rules like I do). 

I've actually been kind of fond of the Dwarves ever since reading about them in the first White Dwarf issue I ever owned (it was covering the big Dwarf release that happened towards the end of 6th edition I believe, though it may have been 7th by then). They're actually my third favourite 'good' Warhammer Fantasy faction after Wood Elves and Bretonnia, and were one of the factions that were almost my first Warhammer Fantasy army (it came down to them, Bretonnia and Wood Elves, before a combination of falling in love with symphonic metal - specifically Nightwish - and the enormous fun I had playing as a Demon Hunter in Diablo 3 swung things in favour of the Wood Elves). I had planned to build a very large Dwarf army at some point in the future (along with Bretonnians, Beastmen, Vampire Counts, The Empire and, well, pretty much every faction except Warriors of Chaos and Ogres), but then GW brought out the ET series and promptly decided to stop selling Warhammer Fantasy models and my dream of owning gigantic armies for almost every Warhammer Fantasy faction died in agony. 

A while ago however I stumbled upon the above Dwarf battalion set in an out-of-the-way hobby store not too far from where I live, and decided it was too good an opportunity to pass up. I've worked out that if I can somehow find a second Dwarf battalion set, two boxes of warriors and some characters I should be able to put together a modest Dwarf army to act as an opposing force for my Wood Elves and Bretonnians (oh I'll also probably need an army book for it too. And any other extras I can scavenege along the way). And so I patiently waited until the anniversary of my existence that happened a month ago, which left me with a pile of cash to burn. After weighing up my options (the alternatives were either getting an Immolator or two off ebay, some Eldar ships for Battlefleet Gothic, or some Sisters of Battle characters), I decided that getting the battalion set and the other stuff below would give me the most bang for my buck. It's definitely a lot bulkier than the other battalion sets I've handled - with almost a third more volume than the Wood Elf and Bretonnian ones - and indeed when I first saw it I thought it was more than just a battalion set. Despite containing roughly the same value as the other ones (approximately three unit boxes and one small box worth of models), it's also very densely packed with quite a few bits, although most of them are weapon options and the sprues feel comparatively light on fun little doodads and extras, although it occurs to me that I may just be spoiled from the Bretonnian kits. 

As well as getting the batalion set, I also raided the online retailers and ordered up this healthy pile of old GW publications. 

Which includes the second version of the 3rd edition Chaos Space Marines codex, the Eye of Terror campaign supplement, Cityfight, and a bunch of White Dwarfs. 

If you collect Chaos Space Marines or experienced the early 2000s 'Silver Age' of Games Workshop, then this book needs no introduction. The second of two Chaos Space Marine codexes published for 3rd edition Warhammer 40,000, the 3.5 edition Codex Chaos Space Marines is considered by many to be one of the high points of Chaos rulesets, second only to the original Realm of Chaos books and the 2nd edition Chaos codex in the number of options, character and fun it provided. It's also infamous for its variant army lists, which included some insanely powerful options for armies (at the time at least. In an age of Unbound armies, superheavy units and S10 and D strength templates flying around they seem almost quaint now). 

I was a little worried about ordering this one, since it's condition was listed as only 'very good', but initial skimmings have shown it to be in remarkably good shape. I was however slightly underwhelmed by the armoury section. Much like the 2nd edition Sisters of Battle codex, after hearing about it for so long on the Internet I was expecting it to have a colossal armoury section spanning dozens of pages and covering every sort of wargear imaginable, but the actual 'wargear' section of the armoury is surprisingly small and is lacking a few things one might expect (the absence of an Auspex, for example, is particularly conspicuous), with the real options instead being found in the Daemonic Gifts and Veteran Skills (which themselves aren't as numerous as I thought they would be, but then I suppose there weren't as many Universal Special Rules floating around back then) sections, as well as the God-Specific items. Somewhat ironically for a book that's so rules-heavy, I think this is the only 3.5 edition era codex I have encountered so far that does not feature a special scenario somewhere in it, which I find strange the more I think about it. I suppose White Dwarf must have had that covered too?

I do worry about this book though. Whenever I look at it it's like... I can hear... voices... whispering to me in my head... saying that Gav Thorpe is a treacherous monster and that GW hates Chaos Space Marines and only takes away the things that make them interesting to give them to Loyalist Space Marines instead, and that Chaos Space Marines have been ruined since 4th edition.. 

A close relative of the 3.5 edition Chaos Codex, Codex: Eye of Terror was a campaign supplement published to introduce people to the famous Eye of Terror worldwide campaign in 2003. I remember seeing it and the Codex: Craftworld Eldar expansion in GW stores when I was a kid (way back in the glory days when they played metal music in the background and had artwork posted up on the walls. Also when model boxes had actual artwork on them... sometimes...) and wondering why they existed, since my childhood logic concluded that anything contained within them must surely be in the Chaos Space Marine and Eldar codexes respectively. It's about as thin as I remember it, although it doesn't have quite as much content as I was expecting (but then that's only to be expected given its length and nature as an introductory booklet). 

The main reason why I wanted it of course was for the legendary Lost And The Damned army list that allowed for armies of Traitor Guard, mutant hordes and pretty much anything Chaos-aligned that isn't a Daemon or Space Marine of some kind. It wasn't... quite what I was expecting, essentially being a list of things you could take from the Chaos Space Marine and Imperial Guard codexes plus a couple of entries for things not covered by either of those books (like the mutants). In hindsight I'm not really sure what I was expecting from it to be perfectly honest, since from what I gather it was only really ever meant to be a way to port over Imperial Guard units into Chaos armies. I guess an armoury section would have been nice, but really most of that would inevitably just be repeating stuff that's already in the other two army lists, and they had to cram in another three entire army lists as well, so I guess I can understand why there isn't one. The only real serious criticism I have about it is that there's no option for a normal human HQ choice - All the HQ options available are from the Chaos Space Marine codex and so are all, well, Chaos Space Marines. Which is fine if you want an ambitious Chaos Space Marine champion rising to the top on a horde of mortal Chaos followers and mutant monstrosities, but if you want a Lost and The Damned army without any Chaos Space Marines at all in it - like I do - then you're fresh out of luck. I know Chaos Space Marines are supposed to be the favoured champions of the Chaos Gods and so on, and that it is based on a campaign about one of Abaddon's black crusades, but Chaos Space Marine-free Chaos armies do exist too, and would it have really been too hard to add in one little entry for a mortal champion or a rouge psyker or something, or a quick "Traitor Command (use Command Squad rules from Codex: Imperial Guard)" to the list of units you can take? Really?

Fortunately the Adversaries options in the Witchhunters codex provides exactly that - options for regular human Chaos followers - but it has this stupid thing where it says you're not allowed to use them against armies that aren't Witchhunters, and it still feels like an excessive number of hoops to jump through. 

There are also three other lists, for the 13th Great Company of Space Wolves (with the glorious metal Wulfen models of old), the Cadian Shock Troops and Eldar from Ulthwe. They're about what you would expect, with the only really odd thing is the Cadian army list including the options for some Internal Guard units. What's weird about that is that the Internal Guard is charged with eliminating subversive cults on Cadia but is formed from the Ordo Malleus and uses Daemonhunters rules, when rooting out subversive cults is usually the Ordo Hereticus's job. Using Daemonhunters rules is kind of understandable, since the whole campaign happened a year before the Witchhunters codex existed, but actually stating it's an Ordo Malleus outfit and not a Hereticus one in the background struck me as.. off. 

Aside from all that, there's some top notch artwork as well. Some is from other places (I recognised one piece from Battlefleet Gothic), others seem to have been included for the first time here. 

Cityfight was another publication I noticed when I was younger, but never really thought much of it. Rather than seeing it in a store, I first happened upon it on the old GW website, where I looked through the little articles and things in its section, noticed a distinct lack of Tau-related content and promptly dismissed it as not worthwhile (during this time I generally tended to avoid any 40k-related material that did not pertain to the Tau in some way, mostly out of childhood fanaticism for my chosen faction, but also because my time and resources for tabletop hobby were even more limited than they are now, and the army I was building was Tau, so they took priority and everything else just sort of fell by the wayside). I did however get its 4th edition descendent Cities of Death, and certainly found a lot to like in that, so after seeing a few tidbits online and reading the designers' notes for it in White Dwarf #261 I thought it perhaps warranted closer inspection. 

There's a lot of artwork in here that I recognise from Cities of Death (though it seems that one of my favourite illustrations in Cities of Death - a black and white piece showing a Battle Sister blasting away with a boltgun from a window while enemy fire pitter-patters off the walls around her - was original to that one and not first included here). This book has a more extensive colour section than Cities of Death, including a detailed blow-by-blow battle report (the same one used to showcase Cityfight in White Dwarf #261 in fact). Its focus is different however, with less attention being given to customising armies for urban combat and more given to building appropriate terrain, which makes sense given that this was before GW put out much in the way of urban terrain (Forgeworld, however, had a beautiful Cityfight range, which is mentioned in the book. It still tears me apart knowing that those terrain pieces will never be sold again). 

There's also some interesting stuff on the mechanics front, especially in the armoury section. Some elements from there would go on to feature in Cities of Death, but many don't. Comparing the two is interesting, with some common items changing between the two (booby traps and combat engineering equipment), and both books having some very brutal tricks in them. Cityfight's sentry guns seem pretty hardcore... 

Cityfight also includes a short list of modifications for codexes. Most of these are rules clarifications over what counts as what for the purposes of cityfight rules interactions, but some of them are extra army list options. The list feels incomplete to me - once again, the Tau are conspicuous in their absence, although this is to be expected as the book was released before the Tau properly existed in 40k, as did the fully-fledged Necrons that also seem strangely missing (and both could probably do with a few clarifications on how certain weapons and wargear interacts with the Cityfight rules). What's far less forgivable is the total absence of any mention of the Sisters of Battle, which most certainly existed at the time the book was published. Granted, at that point they were still confined to a Chapter Approved army list, but you'd think they'd warrant an entry with all their template weapons and whether or not it's possible to give Immolators siege armour, and maybe some amendments in the Cityfight armoury to give them things like, say, multi-melta armed sentry guns or incendiary mines that you would expect them to have. 

White Dwarf #263 completes the holy trinity of White Dwarf magazines that covered the first ever Tau release, ever. Interestingly, this is the first 'old' White Dwarf I've gotten that's in pristine condition - not just excellent or near mint, but literally brand new and seemingly never before touched. As a pleasantly unexpected surprise it also included a pair of supplementary catalogues. I have never seen any examples of them before (though I dimly recall seeing TROLL mentioned somewhere once), anywhere, which suggests that they weren't readily available in the stores, or if they were that I never noticed them once. These two booklets, along with the sealed packaging it came in still having a delivery address that was not mine on it (according to it this issue hails from Miami, the land of Michael Westen) leads me to believe that this was a subscription issue that the receiver for some reason never opened before trading it away. 

It has the usual goodly articles that a White Dwarf of its vintage has, but the real prize for me - and why I wanted it - is the Tau background it contains, especially an article about Vior'la that I don't believe has ever been published anywhere else. There's also the famous guide to Battlesuit configurations, from which many iconic Crisis Team loadouts get their name (If you've ever heard a Tau player call a Crisis Suit with a plasma rifle and a missile pod a Fireknife, this article is where that came from) and which was later published online, and can still be found in Advanced Tau Tactica's official background archive (or on the old GW website through the Wayback Machine). Strangely, it's billed as a tactics article in the contents, but is written purely from a background lore standpoint with zero discussion given over to in-game performance or utility. 

White Dwarf #251 may seem like an odd choice at first, but I put it high on my to-buy list for one very important feature, namely the old 40k Vehicle Design Rules. I've heard a lot about these on the Internet, and so- 

Wait... something's wrong... it's not here... it ISN'T HERE!! Minions!! You PROMISED me you had found it! You SWORE that it would be here, in this issue! Explain to me why it isn't in here! You have FAILED ME!! Why you MISERABLE PATHETIC INCOMPETENT EXCUSES FOR HENCHMEN!! WHY YOU WRETCHED INSUFFERABLE MEWLING GROTESQUE FEEBLE SACS OF PUTRESCENT IMPOTENCE!! Better a Hedgehog for a minion, better a Tumbleweed! You will SUFFER DEARLY FOR THIS TRANSGRESSION!! HEADS WILL ROLL!! I WILL HAVE THE BONES RENT FROM YOUR WORTHLESS BODIES!! I WILL SEE YOU FLENSED WITH SEARING SCOURGES UNTIL YOUR FLESH IS STRIPPED AND RAW!! I WILL SEE YOU BURN IN FIRE AND BOILING OIL!! YOU WILL BLEED FOR FORGIVENESS!! YOU WILL TWIST AND WRITHE AND SCREAM IN PUS-SOAKED BRIMSTONE-SMOULDERING AGONY!! FIND ME THAT WHICH I SEEK!! I WILL BRING HEAVEN AND EARTH CRASHING DOWN IN FLAMES IF I MUST!! I WILL TEAR APART THE ENDS OF THE WORLD!! I WILL RAIN FIRE AND LIGHTNING AND BURNING HAIL DOWN UPON THE LANDS OF MEN!! NONE SHALL BE SPARED MY WRATH UNTIL IT IS MINE!! 

Ahem. The Vehicle Design rules are indeed in this issue, but not all of them. It seems that they must have been revisited at some point, as several elements I have seen in places online are not included, in particular options for designing Tau vehicles. In hindsight it should have been obvious to me that I wouldn't find that in there, since this issue predates the introduction of the Tau by some time, and indeed it quickly dawned on me that was the case when I suddenly encountered the nasty paradox of how rules for a faction could be featured in a publication that was released almost a year before they existed. This threatened to create a universe destroying temporal singularity rift, but fortunately I was able to preserve the fabric of reality at the cost of having all knowledge of how to perform long division erased from my mind for all eternity. You carry the one over, don't you? 

It's not a total loss though. The basic design rules are all there (including a plug for Forgeworld's brand new book Imperial Armour. The very first one they ever published. No, not Imperial Armour Volume 1, the one BEFORE that one), and there's some other useful stuff too, particularly rules for most if not all of the Regiments of Renown in Warhammer Fantasy, as well as a sneak preview for the amazing brand-new Tyranid line coming soon for Warhammer 40,000 (the 3rd edition release in case you were wondering) that I found amusingly quaint and a Lord of the Rings poster still lodged in the middle of the magazine. 

White Dwarf #292 and #293 appear to be the main two issues that covered the 2004 Witchhunters release, and so I added them to the list as well. I walked away feeling like there was surprisingly little coverage given to it in #292, the main Witchhunters-related content was buried towards the back just before the Lord of the Rings section along with the other 40k related articles (in contrast #262 had almost all the Tau-related stuff front and centre). It also lacked a Designers' Notes article and inaugural battle report, which I found equally surprising, but on the other hand it seems to have a healthy chunk of background material I don't recognise (which means it's likely I haven't seen it before) and - in a totally unexpected but wholeheartedly welcome surprise - rules for using Frateris Militia, or Zealots as they're called in it, in 3rd+ edition alongside the Witchhunters codex. Looking at the new releases listed in it and the following issue (most notably neither list features the actual Witchhunters Codex itself) leads me to suspect that there was a third issue given to covering the Witchhunters release, and that I probably want either #294 or (much more likely) #291 as well. 

#293 begins with a brief look at upcoming digital developments, including some obscure unremarkable Real Time Strategy computer game for 40k called Dawn of War. Pfft, nothing to see there, it's only a matter of time before it falls off the public radar and is forgotten like all the other Warhammer computer games. It will never amount to anything. This issue features a tactics article for Witchhunters armies, which is why I got it, as well as a background article with examples of Witchhunters characters and enemies (both this and the tactics article were also featured online) and some painting/modelling articles on Immolators and Penitent engines and a phenomenal First World War inspired Imperial Guard army. The rest of the issue is almost completely given over to covering Storm of Chaos, a Warhammer Fantasy global campaign that I have every confidence and utmost faith will be immortalised as an immutable part of Warhammer Fantasy canon and history for the rest of time, and can only be building towards an incredible breathtakingly epic climax that will be forever loved by Warhammer enthusiasts the world over. 

White Dwarf #212 represents a historic landmark as the first White Dwarf issue of the 1990s era that I now own. Adding to what is quickly becoming a recurring trend, I was somewhat underwhelmed by it. Much like the 2nd edition Sisters of Battle codex (the release of which this issue covered), I had always found the 1990s iteration of White Dwarf to be hyped up as some mythical golden age of content that was vastly superior to all that came after it, and for something with that kind of reputation, I didn't feel like it had that much content. Don't get me wrong, it has plenty of good content, I just don't get the impression that it has considerably more of it than, say, one of the 2001 vintage White Dwarf issues. Most damming is that there's no designers' insights on the Sisters of Battle models or codex or additional background for them that I was expecting to find in it (though it does feature what looks like some interesting special scenarios themed around them, I will give it that). There's also a big section on GorkaMorka (also a new release then) and a bunch of other interesting bits and bobs. There's also supposed to be a cardboard scenery piece included as well, but unlike #263 above whoever first owned this copy DID look through it, and so that little freebie is now long gone. Not that it bothers me that much, I wanted it for the articles. 

Finally there's White Dwarf issues #307 and #308, the main two that covered the 6th edition Wood Elf release (hallowed be thy name). There's what you would expect them to include - designers' notes, painting guides (which much like the assembly guides for Tau ships included in Battlefleet Gothic Magazine #17 would have been nice to know when I was trying to work out how to replicate the studio scheme!) and a couple of battle reports, one of them having the Wood Elves led by an almost-unrecognisable Mat Ward. There are some other interesting bits as well, like the rules for a Regiment of Renown of Amazons for Warhammer Fantasy and a delightfully bizarre Mechanicus army showcase (which has left me desperate for any information revolving around the so-called Phi-Alpha 2 Neutrino Irradiators) and a teaser for the first expansion pack for that Dawn of War computer game from awhile back. How odd, I was certain it was going to crash and burn, and that the Storm of Chaos ending was going to be grand and satisfying! How is it that the impossible is happening? Why next thing you know the Lord of the Rings Strategy Battle Game's runaway popularity will die out after the third movie's run is finished, and they'll take away the Specialist Games! Totally unthinkable! 

Actually, speaking of unthinkable things, there are two things I found utterly hilarious in these issues. The first was a quick sentence in the Wood Elf painting guide warning not to put too much detail on a model so that it doesn't look cluttered, and the second was an article recommending counts-as proxies. Needless to say the idea of showing restraint from excessive model detail and advocating creating your own models to stand in for other units both seem absurdly ironic given GW's recent trends... 

And that's about it. Now to enjoy the wonders of outer space some more. 

Swiftly Goes The Swordplay

Elven hero is now painted, 

I will be very impressed if anyone, 

Actually gets what this was a reference to 

As the second of my two Wardancer troupes is now finished (you can check 'em out in the previous post), the number of Wardancers in my kingdom has now grown large enough that they should get direct representation in my court. So I went and painted up a Wardancer Noble, Aemiria the Queen of Muses.

I also now finally understand what all the fuss about this Finecast stuff is about. You see, up until now all my experience with Finecast had been... reasonable. Not fantastic by any stretch, but... reasonable. The only real problems were the odd bent component. This one on the other hand had, in addition to badly bent weapons, a lot of tabs and/or flash (I often have trouble telling the two apart. Unless flash is that thin membrane that sometimes forms between parts?) in very awkward places (most notable being directly over where the poor Elf's heart would be) that was thoroughly annoying to remove. On the upside though I've finally worked out where I was going wrong with the 'bend components back into shape with hot water' trick - I didn't have the water hot enough! I do feel rather silly for trying to drill out the model's spear shaft now however. Interestingly, the main source of reference material I had for painting her was also perhaps the least likely - the White Dwarf Weekly issue covering the 8th edition Wood Elf re-release, which had the largest image of the studio Wardancer Noble model that I could find. It also showed me that even after all this time and all the other stuff that has happened since, my pure hatred of the 8th edition Wood Elf release has not diminished over time...

In other news, I also have more additions to my collection of old GW publications.

They are, as I understand it, the 6th and 7th edition Empire army books. The same second-hand bookstore I found the Beasts of Chaos and 5th edition Vampire Counts books in also had a bunch of other GW books. I missed out on the 7th edition High Elf book (I think it was that one at least, it had a red border and a guy in white-blue armour swinging a white sword around on the cover) and the 3rd edition Ork codex, which I was actually going for, so I consoled myself by snatching up both versions of the Empire army book while they were there (my original plan was for just the 6th edition one).

I've only read the 6th edition one cover to cover so far. I've skimmed through the 7th edition one, and it seems to have more or less the same sort of content if in a considerably different layout. Both books actually had less background than I thought they would have, especially in regards to the different territories (States? Provinces? I see both terms used for them in the books) of the Empire - the closest I could get to a run-down on what each one is like in terms of culture and resources and whatnot was a little two-page spread at the back of the 7th edition book, which was very surprising. I can only assume that detailed information on people details of each Empire territory was lost in the changeover to 6th edition along with the War Wagon.

On the other hand, one thing the 6th edition book did a really good job of was getting me inspired to start an Empire army. I was instantly able to 'click' and understand how an Empire army was supposed to work, and why it worked the way it did, and gave me a whole bunch of ideas about what to do for it. It's also something of a paradox however, because the Empire books are a textbook illustration of why I hate rigidly defined background settings with no room for flexibility so much.

You see, it all started when I came up with the idea to (hypothetically, since all the models have been discontinued) do an Empire army with a Shakespearean theme. I've had a soft spot for Shakespeare ever since High School, and given the whole neo-Elizabethan thing The Empire has going on I thought it might be cool to do an Empire army with characters taken from Shakespeare's plays. I was all fired up for this, and there was just one last detail remaining: what colour scheme to use. I thought about this for a couple of moments, and then found the obvious answer, green and white - the red and white studio scheme looked pretty cool, and green is my favourite colour, so the logical solution seemed to be to take the red and white studio scheme and replace the red with green. Simple enough.

Now, in case you're not familiar with the background of The Empire, the idea is that it's split up into several different territories with their own leadership and infrastructure and what have you, who in turn answer to a central court headed by an elected Emperor, kind of like a feudal version of the United States (or those little German states that existed before the 19th century if they all had a common governing body, if you're more historically inclined). As I've already alluded to, each one of these territories does have it's own outlined history and heraldry and state colours (that red and white studio scheme is the colours of Talabheim for example), and as an enthusiast of background I'd naturally therefore have to check to make sure that the green and white colour scheme I wanted isn't already taken. So I fliped over to the colour section of the army book, to find...





... that green and white is the official colour scheme of Stirland. Fuck.


It's actually for the Stir river patrol to be precise, Stirland proper is green and what seems to be a sort of yellowish off-white creme , but the river Stir is (presumably, since like I said there aren't really that many descriptions of the different territories) mostly Stirland's problem so it seems to be pretty much the same diff. Ok, calm down, it's not the end of the world, this is bad but it's still salvageable. These areas seem to be pretty big and expansive, if the details about them are vague enough, it might just be possible to drop an army down there without anyone noticing. Now, I want a fairly archetypical Empire army, a big core of lots of State Troops (in units no bigger than 25 of course. Giant 30+ units just feel wrong) backed up by a plenty of firepower in an arsenal of artillery, Handgunners and a Steam Tank or two. With some Crossbowmen as well. Y'know, as backup or something. And some other stuff as well in support. Oh and plenty of characters - this is supposed to be a Shakespeare themed army after all. So if I can get all that and have them looking nice and resplendent in noble Elizabethan style, I might just be ok. So I scour the army book for information about this 'Stirland' place...





... only to find that it's a poor rustic backwater with a propensity towards low-end units not always in the best shape they could be, in other words exactly what I don't want the army to be like. Fuck.


Alright, so at this point it looks like the whole Stirland thing isn't going to work. Yes, there's some fun to be had in being the ragtag underdog triumphing against the odds through skill and courage and all that, and yes the Mechanicals were a fairly big part of A Midsummer Night's Dream, but well I've always gravitated more towards the nobility characters in Shakespeare, mostly because they're usually the major characters, get the most lines, get the coolest lines, and I tend to be a glory-hound. So green and white is out. Ok, time for a new approach. I can't do green and white, but maybe another colour scheme will work instead. Hmmm, let's see, my favourite colour is green, but my second favourite colour is red, so what if I used both of them? Yes! Brilliant! Green and red, my two favourite colours, and they'll provide a good contrast too! Now let's make sure it isn't already used...





... It's the official colour scheme for Hochland. Fuck.


To be fair, this isn't a total deal-breaker. There seems to be enough room for the sort of army I'd be looking for here. But it was used in the little introductory short story towards the start of the army book, and that annoys the rebelious non-conformist in me, so I'd prefer to avoid it if at all possible.


Ok, so I can't do green and white, and I can't do green and red. Alright, forget using my favourite colours, let's just start completely from scratch. Now, what are some nice interesting colour combinations. How about yellow and purple?


Ostermark. Fuck.


Alright, what about red and blue?


Altdorf. Fuck.


Blue and yellow?


Nordland. Fuck.


Blue and orange? They're supposed to be complimentary colours according to the colour wheel, surely they'd be an interesting combination that isn't taken?


Actually it isn't, but it looks ugly to me. Fuck.


In theory I could just do a mixed force representing a coalition of troops from different areas, which would allow me to use a whole bunch of different colour schemes. On the one hand this could tie into the planned background fairly well, allowing me to place characters from areas of The Empire that line up fairly well to their background in the plays (Hamlet could be from Nordland, for example), but the catch is that Warhammer Fantasy armies tend to look best when each unit is part of a unified whole (and unified looking armies tend to pander to my delusions of grandeur better), and such a mixture of colour schemes could start to make it look too disorganised and chaotic. At this point it also occurs to me that one colour scheme that isn't taken is green and black (the closest is Nuln, which is black and, well, more black really), which could actually work quite well and would be one that I'd be interested in, but it still doesn't quite grab me.

So my options for this hypothetical army would be:

A) Green and black,

B) A mixed force from different areas using their appropriate colour schemes or,

C) Biting the bullet and painting them all green and red and making the army from Hochland.

All three of which are instances where I like it, but I don't love it.

I suppose the thing to take away from this is that The Empire background is really aimed towards hobbyists with a very different mindset to me. The impression I get is that the Empire background is really geared towards the historical-focused 'rivet counter' type, the sort of hobbyist who spends countless hours poring over detailed historical accounts and guidebooks and painstakingly replicating a force that's 100% accurate to a historical one from the source material right down to the most meticulous of details. The sort who won't just make any army from faction N, but the XYZth regiment of A troop, B corps, with every unit present and accounted for as it was at the battle of C. And indeed most of what I've seen on the internet supports this - in my experience the typical Empire collector will usually have latched onto and fallen in love with one specific province or city-state or whatever, and base his or her army around that.

Which is all well and good, but the problem is, well, that's a very different mindset to me.

I am not like that sort of hobbyist at all. I'm a creative, imaginative sort with a brain that can perhaps best be described as a sort of living fiction factory. I tend to be fairly individualistic and have a non-conformist streak a mile wide (as you can probably tell if you read the last post). This means that I approach the tabletop hobby as a sort of self-expressive art, and consequently I don't want to replicate some existing army or fleet or whatever, I want to make my army or fleet or whatever. I want to take a bunch of models that I like and make them mine. Even when I use a colour scheme that's reverse-engineered from the studio one (which in fairness is basically every army/fleet I've done so far), it almost always ends up gaining some sort of twist that makes it unique to me. And they almost all have some sort of unique backstory - they're never based on an existing force. My Wood Elf army, for example, was never inspired from any particular part of Athel Loren or Wood Elf history, it was inspired by symphonic and folk metal music. The Vampire Counts army I planned to do was never going to be based on one of the established bloodlines (it was almost going to be Lahmian, but they're supposed to use lots of Skeletons, and I wanted the army to be heavy on Zombies, Wolves, Bats, Spirits and, well, not Skeletons. Don't get me wrong, I like a good horde of Skeletons as much as the next guy, they are a classic Fantasy staple for a reason, but the way I see it armies of Skeletons are what the Tomb Kings are for, so I wanted to focus on the non-Skeleton elements because they're different). And I've already mentioned my idea for a Shakespeare powered Empire army. Heck the only reason my Tau are always from the T'au Sept is because my fondness for them predates my non-conformist side coming to prominence (that didn't happen until a few years after getting into 40k - and by extension tabletop gaming - through the Tau).

And so the upshot of all this is that I need to have the sort of creative freedom to do those things in a tabletop setting in order to fully enjoy it. Which is why I hated the 8th edition Wood Elf background splitting up Athel Loren into 12 all-encompassing 'eternal realms' so much, and why I seriously struggle to find enjoyment in Battletech's setting, and why my biggest complaint about Battlefront's new Team Yankee game is that it's based on a technothriller book. I don't want to make armies that conform to ones present and accounted for in the setting's in-universe history, I want to make armies that are an expression of who I am and are distinctly my own thing and a small part of myself within that setting. And the sad thing is I'm having a harder and harder time to find that.

You know what, forget about it. I'm probably the problem. Just some no-good loner freak who can't fall in line and doesn't get what it's supposed to be about.

I'm going into space. I may be some time.

We Are The Edema Ruh

We know the songs the sirens sang, 
See us dream every tale true, 
The verse we leave with you will take you home

Yes yes I know I know it's been forever since I updated this thing... again...

But here's what I've been working on in the interim. I figured that for a blog called 'Naked Metal', this blog doesn't feature nearly enough unpainted metal, which is actually sort of the point - one of the multiple reasons I chose that name is because I wanted to showcase a lot of metal models before they get painted, both to document them in an A-Z sort of way (plus I always find it fascinating to see models in their unassembled state and how the different parts fit together), but also as a celebration of my favourite model medium and a way of rebelling against the mainstream tabletop community. Metal, you see, doesn't generally tend to get a good reputation as a model medium, and 'naked metal', referring to unpainted metal pieces, is often used with connotations of ugliness. I tend to be something of a rebellious non-conformist, so I decided to adopt the phrase in a positive light and celebrate it as a badge of pride in order to stick it to be tabletop Man.What's that? Don't like metal models? Think unpainted metal looks ugly? Well screw you and your 'rules'! I don't have to conform to your system! I'm not going to be a robot and lie down with the rest of the sheeple! I love metal models, and I'm going to flaunt my unpainted metal models in all their pewter glory and if you don't like that then tough greenstuff! And you know what, while I'm at it, I never want to own a (loyalist) Space Marine army in my entire life! So in your face "Every hobbyist always wants/gets a Space Marine army at some point" GW! Fight the machine!

*Dons denim jacket and rides motorcycle off into the sunset*

Ahem. With that said, these are the models as they were, glorious metal sculpts that they are.

Hmmm, in hindsight I probably should have used the black background instead. And set up better lighting. Note to self...

And here they are painted. As much as I love how cool unpainted metal models look, I do like how they look when painted nicely even more. Now if only I could actually paint them nicely...

The letters on their bases of course stand for the unit's name The Empty Spiral. This was originally going to be the only Wardancer Troupe in the army, but then I needed to add more units to bulk the army up to 3000 points (or possibly 4000, I remember it was one of the two) in order to accommodate the characters I wanted, and I worked out that doubling the Wardancers and Rare choices was a convenient way to do that. It also solved a naming dilemma that had arisen by then, since I was torn between sticking to the plan and naming the Wardancer Troupe the Empty Spiral, or instead giving them the name Dark Passion Play, in reference to the album Dark Passion Play by Nightwish (which remains to this day my favourite album of all time. The weird crescent crown-looking thing on the BSB's banner is a direct reference to the cover art on it). This was originally going to be the name for the entire army overall (the idea being that army would be called The Dark Passion Play, and would come from a part of Athel Loren called the Meadows of Heaven), but I had come to realise that it would be the perfect name for a Wardancer Troupe. Fortunately after bulking the army out to the right points limit I was left with two Wardancer Troupes, and so was able to use both names for them.

But it's not just models that have been happening recently. I also managed to find another treasure trove of old Warhammer books at a local second-hand bookstore. The first ones to be extracted from this goldmine were copies of the 6th edition Beastmen army book (Beasts of Chaos) and the 5th edition Vampire Counts army book.

I've only properly read through the Beasts of Chaos book so far, and I have to say I was... actually a little bit underwhelmed by it. Don't get me wrong it's a great book, the background is nice, a lot of the rules are brilliant (Beastmen Herds and heavy skirmishers FTW) and there's some fantastic artwork (my favourite is probably 'The Gibbet Tree of Woe', followed closely by 'The Challenge'), but... for some odd reason it just doesn't suck me in like the 6th edition Wood Elf and Bretonnian army books do. I enjoyed reading it, but it didn't really leave me feeling 'fired up' like those other two books did, and after hearing so much hype about it online that was a bit of a disappointment.

I've only skimmed through the Vampire Counts book, but so far it shows a lot of promise. The artwork is great, and it looks like there's a lot of material packed into it (both books are actually quite meaty). It also has what is probably one of my favourite inside covers of any army book produced by GW.

I think that's about everything for now. Back to the painting space (and crying my hobby woes away)...

From the Ashes

Good god has it really been that long since I've posted here? I could have sworn there had been something after the Custodian.

Oh well. I'm back now, after finally finishing the third (out of a planned four) Glade Guard regiment for my Wood Elves, The Spirit of Spring.

This unit had a troubled development. I actually started on it about mid-way through last year, but then had to put it on hold along with every other part of my life not related to assignment writing in order to cop with the unending onslaught of university work that happened in the last semester (fortunately, I will never have to worry about that again). Then just as it was finally getting finished, a freak accident occurred that resulted in yet more delays.

In the end though I think it turned out ok. It would seem that I've lost my touch with mixing colours however - I tried to recreate the same light blues and yellows that I used for the spites on the Treeman Ancient, but couldn't get quite the same shades. Not that it matters too much, I still like how they turned out, especially the blue one. If I could change one thing I would probably make the basecoat and first layer on the yellow spite a little bit darker (especially the basecoat), since it's kind of hard to distinguish the detail on it as is.

Really though the only fault I have is the basing on the movement tray, which has a few 'accidents' on it caused by the particularly thin PVA glue used to stick basing materials on spilling over the sides (and taking the aforementioned basing materials with it). Looking at the pictures though it doesn't seem too noticeable.

But all wars have casualties, and alas, I must end this post on a sad note, with the loss of an unsung hero that was dearly loved and is sorely missed.

My trusty paint-water glass, which has faithfully cleaned my paint brushes ever since I first started this hobby over 13 years ago when I was 8 years old. It's been with me every step of my tabletop journey, and a lot of other events, and was an iconic symbol of my hobby roots and childhood. I close my eyes, The lantern dies, The scent of awakening, Wild honey and dew...

The freak accident I mentioned above was said glass falling onto the floor and breaking (and scattering dirty paint-water everywhere in the process, though the effects seem to have been negligible), which left me out of action painting-wise until I could find a replacement, which I eventually did. It still isn't just quite the same though...

That will be it for now. There still isn't any new Fantasy background at the moment, since I'm still assessing how much demand there would be for it (as it doesn't comply with GW official background anymore). Seeing more and more people looking towards past-hammer and being dissatisfied with GW's recent background material is making me lean more and more towards 'yes' however.