Living Dead Girl

 And so at last, on the eve of all Hallows night, the climax of International Goth Month, we come to the final scary Warhammer army I've wanted for a long time but will likely never be. And you best believe I saved the best for last, the most Halloween of armies, one that by without even trying is a near perfect fusion of ghoulish fiends and beautiful women in sexy monster outfits. 

What else could it be? 

Living Dead Girl - Millitant's Vampire Counts 

Vampire Counts are another of my top 3 favourite bad guy armies in Warhammer, and jostle with Beasts of Chaos for the number 1 spot. They were indeed for a long time one of the leading frontrunners to be the first ever Warhammer army I started with, until Dark Passion Play and Diablo III happened and changed everything forever. In fact they even followed a similar trajectory to my path towards the Wood Elves. 

It all began by coincidence when I ended up getting, in early 2007, one of the White Dwarf issues covering the release of the new army book for The Empire in 7th edition Warhammer. In particular, this one featured a battle report showcasing some of the new Empire units and characters. Now, the Empire models were very exciting and managed to break me out of my 'Sci-fi Ride or Die' mentality and get me interested in fantasy briefly, a feat that had at that point been accomplished in Warhammer only by the Dwarfs (it was the flintlocks and clock-punk you see). 

But then a funny thing happened. The army being pitted against the shiny new Empire models also grabbed my attention. It was a collection of various classic spooky Halloween monsters all lead by some Vampires. And that concept caught my interest in a way that it never should have. See this was when I was still in the grip of my science fiction only phase. The level of coolness in these kinds of narrative concepts was directly proportional to the amount of technology they contained, and INVERSLY proportional to the amount of magic and Halloween monsters they contained. Horror films were just barely in the cool zone, and even then it was only Silence of The Lambs type ones where the monster was a serial killer or something with no supernatural elements in sight. At this point in time, those kinds of fiendish ghosts and ghouls were in my eyes the exclusive domain of lame dumb little kids stuff, the very bottom of the coolness barrel. 

But this Warhammer army, these so-called Vampire Counts, they somehow managed to make it work. 

It was likely the models that carried it, but something in the game faction's soul managed to somehow make these elements cool in a way that they never really had to me before. I was fascinated by them. Everything seemed to somehow click. And it was this discovery that not only made me reconsider supernatural themes for the first time ever, but also kept that nascent interest alive until another big milestone a few years later that, again, happened entirely by coincidence. 

One night, as I was looking for something to watch on TV while I painted models, I flipped over to C4 on a whim. What I beheld would stay with me for decades to come. I arrived right in the middle of a horror film, but unlike any I had seen before. It featured magic and Halloween monsters, specifically vampires, but they were very different to the caricatures I was familiar with. There were no red and black capes or white frilly bibs in sight. Instead, this vampire film was dark and brooding and violent and blood-soaked and honestly pretty metal. It had (who I learnt later was) Winona Ryder all breathy in corsets, and (who I learnt later was) Monica Bellucci naked from the waist up crawling all over a hapless guy, and I was around 16 at the time so that was a big factor too. 

I didn't know it yet, because I had missed the start of the film, but I was for the very first time watching Bram Stoker's Dracula. 

And I was hooked. I was hooked from the moment I first saw half-nude Monica Bellucci crawling all over some helpless guy (again, this was when I was about 16), and watched the entire rest of the film utterly enthralled. That film was a total game changer. At long last, vampires had started to become kind of cool for me, and that film paved the way for Van Helsing and the Old World of Darkness that were soon to follow. Needless to say this had only improved the standing of that weird Halloween monster vampire army in Warhammer, and I was now seriously considering a Halloween vampire Warhammer army of my own at some point in the future. 

While this string of coincidences had built my desire for a Vampire Counts army of some kind, the specifics of its nature would be shaped by my increasing contact with the goth girls at high school and another, far less fortunate game changer - the apocalyptic fallout of my first attempts at dating some of them. The full horrors of those dark times are now best left undisturbed, and certainly are not appropriate for this blog, but the important thing here is that it left the imprint of the darkly beauteous sexually confident villainess who uses her wiles as much as her weapons forever burnt into my psyche as an iconic character type. 

Then later on I discovered that they also happen to be a lot of fun to write. So when I (re)discovered that in Warhammer there is actually a whole vampire bloodline of just that character it was a natural first choice for what flavour of Vampire Counts are my favourite. Discovering Victoria Frances along the way helped too. 

And that's why if I had enough 2002 era GW Zombies and Vampire Counts metal models, the result would look something like this: 

The House of Favole (Lahmia Bloodline)

Colours: Black and red dresses on characters, natural colours for creatures (decaying flesh for zombies, dark fur for bats and wolves etc.), dark garments and corroded metals for wights. 

An off-shoot of the Lahmian dynasty that has long since assimilated into the Old World and abandoned much of their Nehekharan traditions. They are still fiercely loyal and deeply close with their fellow Lahmian sisters however and frequently cooperate with Neferata's schemes. 

Lords Ladies

Elize Favole: Level 3 Vampire Lady with Seduction, Wristbands of Black Gold and Biting Blade, mounted on a Zombie Dragon - 730 pts 

Monica: Level 2 Vampire Countess with Seduction, Beguile and Tomb Blade - 340 pts 

Solomon Crowley: Level 4 Master Necromancer with Spell Familiar, Cursed Book and Ring of The Night - 315 pts 

Heroes Heroines Villains Villainesses 

Jeanette: Vampire Thrall Battle Standard Bearer with Hell Banner - 170 pts 

Darla: Vampire Thrall with Beguile and Sword of Unholy Power - 130 pts 

Salma: Vampire Thrall with Blood Drinker - 130 pts 

Delphine: Vampire Thrall with Innocence Lost and Sword of Might - 125 pts 

Mina: Vampire Thrall with Innocence Lost and Sword of Battle - 130 pts

Necromancer: Level 2 Necromancer with Power Familiar - 150 pts

Necromancer: Level 2 Necromancer with Skull Staff - 140 pts 

Wraith: Wraith with Obsidian Amulet, mounted on a Barded Ethereal Nightmare - 147 pts 

Wight Lord: Wight Lord with Heavy Armour, Sword of The Kings and Enchanted Shield - 99 pts 

Core 

Zombie Horde: 25 Zombies with Full Command - 165 pts

Zombie Horde: 25 Zombies with Full Command - 165 pts 

Zombie Horde: 25 Zombies with Full Command - 165 pts 

Zombie Horde: 25 Zombies with Full Command - 165 pts

Ghoul Clan: 10 Ghouls with Ghast - 90 pts 

Ghoul Clan: 10 Ghouls with Ghast - 90 pts

Bat Swarm: 5 Bat Swarm bases - 300 pts 

Dire Wolf Pack: 10 Dire Wolves with Doom Wolf - 110 pts 

Dire Wolf Pack: 10 Dire Wolves with Doom Wolf - 110 pts 

Dire Wolf Pack: 10 Dire Wolves with Doom Wolf - 110 pts 

Dire Wolf Pack: 10 Dire Wolves with Doom Wolf - 110 pts 

Special 

Grave Guard Regiment: 20 Grave Guard with Hand Weapons, Shields, Full Command and Banner of Doom - 340 pts

Grave Guard Regiment: 20 Grave Guard with Halberds, Shields, Full Command and Banner of The Dead Legion - 355 pts 

Grave Guard Regiment: 20 Grave Guard with Halberds, Shields, Full Command and Screaming Banner - 370 pts

Black Knight Regiment: 10 Black Knights with Barded Nightmares, Full Command and Banner of The Barrows - 335 pts 

Fell Bat Flock: 10 Fell Bats - 200 pts

Fell Bat Flock: 10 Fell Bats - 200 pts 

Fell Bat Flock: 10 Fell Bats - 200 pts

The Oblivion: 5 Spirit Host bases - 325 pts

Rare

Banshee: 1 Banshee - 90 pts

Banshee: 1 Banshee - 90 pts

Banshee: 1 Banshee - 90 pts

Black Coach: 1 Black Coach - 200 pts 

Spoils 

Damsel Swain: Level 0 nubile doe-eyed Ingenue Damsel to-be held in the clutches of unholy temptation - 19 pts 

TOTAL: 7000 pts

The first crucial element of this list is the Bloodline Powers. Vampires in Warhammer can take a bunch of special abilities that reflects their supernatural Vampire abilities, with each bloodline getting a unique set. The only catch is that at least one of the army book's writing team was a sour prude who hates fun so they compete for points with magic items. But right now the important thing to note is that Lahmians get access to the single best vampire power in the entire book, and easily one of the best special abilities in the entire game, Seduction, which causes opposing characters to fall so madly in love with your vampires that they switch sides mid-fight and do your bidding for a turn. It is glorious and worth every single one of its 55 points. 

Seduction was always going to be going on the head vampiress of the army, and for Elize Favole it is paired with some Wonder Woman-grade magic wristbands to deflect shooting attacks with style and elegance. This doesn't leave a whole lot of points left over for weapons, but there is just enough to squeeze in a magic sword. 

Which brings up another important element - with the exception of the standard bearer every single vampire in the army is carrying some kind of magic weapon, because no self-respecting Lahmian queen of the night would degrade herself by getting her hands and fingernails dirty fighting unarmed, and no Lahmian queen of the night worth her dresses would settle for any mere piece of dull metal for a weapon. The only reason the standard bearer has to go without one is because the rules won't let me take one along with a big flashy magic standard. I can only conclude that the rules for Battle Standards were written by the same fun-hating sour prude who wrote in the part where Bloodline Powers are not a separate points budget to Magic Items. 

Elize is joined by a right-hand Vampire Countess who also packs Seduction, because having two characters with it doubles the chances of it happening each turn. She also has Beguile, because I want to get some of the other Lahmian manipulation powers into the army too, and the best magic sword in the Vampire Counts army book, the tomb blade which revives those mortals slain by it as mindless slaves to serve their new mistress for all eternity. 

Completing the trinity of high-end characters is a master necromancer held in check by his obsessive lust over Elize herself. He gets a spell familiar because having more spells to choose from is always good, and the Cursed Book because every good wizard needs either a magic staff or a magic spellbook and the Cursed Book was the only magic book available that didn't compete with the spell familiar. 

The low-end character selection is dominated by a quintet of Vampire Thralls that comprise much of the army's fighting power. One carries the Hell Banner because the only thing better than a unit that causes Fear is a unit that causes Terror. Another has Beguile because as established I love Presence powers in Warhammer as much as I love them in Vampire The Masquerade. 

Rounding the characters out are a pair of Necromancers for a little bit of magic support and to sustain larger numbers of undying minions, and a Wight Lord and Wraith to give me at least one of every available character type. 

The Core units consist of at least one of every available option except one. The key theme for this army, besides sexy vampires. is No Skeletons. At All. No units of them bought, no units of them raised or summoned, just none in the army whatsoever. Don't get me wrong, I love a good skeleton horde as much as the next fantasy nerd, but the thing is if I want a skeleton horde I can go to a whole other Warhammer game faction called the Tomb Kings just for that specifically. If I want other flavours of undead, I have no alternatives besides the Vampire Counts. So for the Vampire Counts army I'm bringing every single other variety of undead horror I can, besides Skeletons. 

This is also the key reason why I'm not using the Lahmian list and instead defaulting to the regular army book list. Giving up swains is unbearable, but being stuck with a boring troop unit is even more so. I can only hope that the fun-hating sour prude behind all these decisions gets what's coming to them. 

Instead of Skeletons there are 4 nice big units of Zombies to give me a dependable source of rank bonuses for my vampires that I don't have to roll magic dice for, and plenty of Wolves and Bats for roaming the land far and wide and being my eyes and ears. There's also a couple of packs of Ghouls to tear apart any defiant mortals who displease me. 

For Special units there's a trio of Grave Guard regiments to provide a solid battle line and a unit of Black Knights to act as a mobile reserve to help push through a decisive breakthrough or plug a hole in a troubled sector. There's also a healthy-sized Sprit Host to tie down a key area and plenty of nice giant bats to both spy on my enemies and conduct general harassment of opposing armies. 

Finally, every self-respecting vampire needs a magnificent Black Coach to whisk them away from danger, and the metal GW one is one of my favourite models in the Vampire range, so naturally I'm taking as many as I'm allowed. It shares the Rare section with a trio of Banshees for troubleshooting particularly tough adversaries. 

And that's what I'd do with masses and masses of 2000s Vampire Counts models.  If you wish to see this army on the tabletop then you are welcome to donate any NIB 2002-2004 NIB Vampire Counts models to me free of charge, especially NOS 2002-2004 Zombies. 

Otherwise have a spooktacular sugar-fueled Halloween!